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Married at First Sight - Jephte

January 26, 2018

By popular demand, I've been asked to peel back the onion called Jephte!


Whew! He has entirely too much happening here. Let's break down contextual factors first. Jephte is from Haitian family, probably strongly religious, very enmeshed, focused on cultural preservation and extreme pressure from the mouth and eye glares of mom. In addition, he has high level of responsibility within his household. I did not hear him mention an active father within the home. So, he has been an acting father/brother throughout his life for his many siblings, as well as mom's right hand. I would also extend to state that Caribbean cultures can be very critical, and distrusting at times. His purpose is wrapped up in being highly responsible, which causes a bed of anxiety and fear of mistake. 


Now, to his foolery on the show! I'm unsure of Jephte's real reason for marriage, but I assume this could be an extension of wanting to have his own path as an independent man in the world. I'm unsure if he has had the opportunity to be fully independent to come into his own outside of the various pressures and constructions he has lived within throughout his life. I'm sure he is ready for a new chapter, but I'm unsure if marriage at first sight is ready for him! His moves have been micromanaged, and set out for him based on the needs of others. I'm unsure if he knows his own voice, or how to operate with that freedom of self. I think he has a lot of anxiety about the unpredictability, and is trying to find control of the process for security. So, I think he is battling with that natural way of operating in his new marriage, which is unfair for Shawneice. I hope that he looks beyond himself to develop increased self-awareness, maturity, and self-identity. 


Overall, I wish he had adequately prepared for this experiment. I feel by season six, you should know how this works. Such a disservice to the show and viewers when someone really isn't ready for this type of adventure. My suggestion to him is to take this day by day, and look outside himself and his bubble. Enjoy a new chapter of your life, and not need to micromanage each part. Challenge yourself because growth occurs in discomfort. Do anyway, even though the anxiety in your makes you second guess a potential good thing. Stop being aggy as hell!  



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